Forging ahead … and waiting

Well, the house was appraised today (a step in a looooong succession of bank steps we’ve been through, it seems), thus clearing one more hurdle. After this it should be smooth sailing. No, really. In a matter of weeks this blog will actually chronicle renovations rather than my rather uninteresting and pathetic life.

Speaking of pathetic … why do I always do dumb things in front of large audiences? Last night during the middle school open house, we teachers were passing a microphone, introducing ourselves. I meant to start out with something friendly, like “hi,” but what came out was a loud “Uuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhh” which I tried to turn into a “hi” but ended up sounding like a sick cow. Oh well. Just stick this instance in the “I embarrass myself” folder, which is fairly bulging with examples.

Today was, in one word, exhausting. Being my neurotic self, I ended up waking up at 4:15 a.m. with one thought in my head: what are we doing for homeroom? The logical answer should have been, “Who the hell cares?” because in the larger scheme of things, homeroom ranks pretty low. But it bothered me that we just had a meeting about this the day before, and I couldn’t remember what we had decided on. I tried to get to sleep, but I tried in vain. The clock ticked on until my alarm woke me up at 5:30, and I heard every tick. (Theoretically, that is, since my clock is digital.)

I wasn’t prepared for the utter chaos and agony that is middle school. I remember it pretty well, but I wasn’t prepared to view it after all this time. Almost every kid exudes a confusing mix of self-consciousness and cockiness; their facial expressions constantly fluctuate from one to the other, making for an interesting observation. The sixth graders were an eclectic mix of puny boys versus girls who looked ready for high school. Ugh, I remember that agony — the vast difference in development that was so painfully obvious to everyone.

The day’s been a blur, and I’m too tired to think about tomorrow, although I know I have to. There are plans to make, seating charts to create, and magic to work. Two of the three are possible.

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One Reply to “Forging ahead … and waiting”

  1. I know! You should take a camera to school with you and threaten every pimply kid with having his picture posted on your blog – or on the walls of your classroom. Then you need to take a deep breath and have either a glass of red wine before bed, or better yet – and my personal favorite – would be a mug of hot cocoa. Not the fake stuff either, you know, the real stuff. Then, I wouldn’t worry about my laptop. It will get fixed – hopefully, and if not, then I always have at least 5 other Mac desktops in this house to keep me going. Unfortunately, all my personal information and passwords and crap are stored on my laptop. Now that stinks.

    Have a great rest of the week, Jen!


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